Dear Readers,
This leaving thing weird. I leave for college in two days. And don't get me wrong I am SUPER excited to blow this Popsicle stand and move onto bigger and better things, but while eating some delicious One-Upmanish Cooknies with a few friends I hardly see I realized how much I will miss these people. No doubt I think they are stupid and no doubt that there are days when I hate all of my friends, but I will miss hating them. I will miss these people.
The first of my friends to leave left on Thursday. I went to say goodbye in the morning, and it took me almost all I had not to break into tears. Now I am normally not the most sappy sentimental person, but there are a few things that get me. Between leaving friends and the end of You've Got Mail I believe I have cried enough tears to last my life time. And then after the first heart break I didn't get a break my next friend left Friday. I watched the end of a japanimation series with him on Thursday night, and it hit me that I won't see these people till Christmas. Four months...
It's not like I won't make new friends, but it is weird that these people I have seen everyday for four years will not be in my life anymore. Weird....
So between the continual goodbyes, late night eating feast, and working I haven't had much time to think. And now this no so busy late night is throwing me off. I am looking back at this last week, this last year actually and thinking about all of the new friends I made, fun times I enjoyed, and all of the times I have hated the world.
Oh the cosmic bitches, who ate lunch with me almost everyday. I love you girls and I hope that we never lose touch because you guys complete me.
There are all of the boiz that I hung out with this year. No mother none of them are my boyfriend. Yes were are friends and they are boys. Enough said.
There was the whirlwind of lasts. Last band competition, the last high play performance, the last year in speech, the last All-State, the last Tulip Festival, the last parade, the last Dutch Dozen performance. The last day of school. The last time I will see many people I graduated with. The last day of work at the pool and library. The last... So many lasts.
But lets not forget all of the fun. The leaving for lunch, the many many study halls, my new friends at landsmeer and the bakery, the choir trip, the desert dust storm in Iowa, the mass amount of books, the new laptops, prom, after prom, Perkins, bonfires, swimming after hours, concerts, iced coffee late at night, many poor decisions, many good decisions, shopping with boys, starting my blogs, graduating, deciding on college. So many good things.
Even the bad things now somehow seem good. Somehow all of the years drama seems to wash away while sitting on the couch late at night. Everything seems good, and hopefully it will be.
If I had a glass I would raise it, but since I am not of age and it is like midnight I have nothing to raise. As I lift my empty hand into the air I toast to all of the success and unsuccess that I have had over this wonderful year. I toast to the friends I have lost and the friends I have made. I toast to the books I have read and the recipes I have tried. I toast to every post I have made. I toast to every hateful thought I have had. I toast to every hope/dream I have had. I toast to the future friends I am going to make. I toast to all of the fun times and and times I will have. I toast to the bittersweetness of leaving. I toast to the peculiar sadness of One-Upmanish Cooknies. I toast to LIFE.
Lindsey
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